Men's

"Damn, man, I can't figure out these bisexual girls from UArts," he says from his urinal to mine like there's an antenna on my pee station that operates on his frequency and I smile like I would at a homeless person. Did you know they keep mouthwash in this bathroom? Shit, they've got it all covered: wash the sin out of your hands and face and then rinse it out of your main sin receptor before filling it again with leaden water. I'm sweating out of my eyes and I still have the singer's itch. Performing always seems less inspired when you've been forced prematurely into the spotlight.

"Have you met the prisoner? Tell them the story of your crime, friend. 

If that's OK with you."